10 types of people you always see at an iftar table

The iftar table often reveals our true personalities because, first, we have been fasting since dawn, and second, the cold shorbot is making the last few minutes feel a little too long. So, we present to you the types of people at iftar, so you can pick which one matches your personality.

Health-Conscious Mythical Creature

No matter how much food is on the table, there is always someone with a no-sugar, chia seed lemonade for iftar. While everyone around them chews food vigorously, holding on to dear life, they delicately bite the date, gazing lovingly at the sliced cucumbers. Moreover, they have zero tolerance for oil, and meticulously pat the beguni dry until there is no life left in it.

The Azan Delulu

They are so delusional, whether it is the TV or any faint buzz, they come sprinting to the dining table with their arm outstretched for a date, screaming, “Maghrib azan!” People whip out their phones to check the time, only to find out that it isn’t even close to Maghrib. The guy just heard a random pressure cooker three buildings away.

He would still argue that he really, really heard the first part of the Azan. And by the time it is Maghrib, people around him no longer trust their ears.

The Routine Shorbot Maker

They are always with a large pitcher, mouths as dry as the Sahara, but skilfully squeezing lemons and adding ice with precision. Every day during Ramadan, they make shorbot without complaint, adding sugar, fruit pulp, and water; repeating the process until there are 10 seconds left for iftar.

The Overfed Martyr

There has to be a person who is dizzy and barely surviving all day. But at the time of Azan, they are suddenly ready to beat Usain Bolt. The first glass of shorbot vanishes before it is barely poured, then the second one is gone in three heroic gulps.

What starts as a simple "taste" of deep-fried food quickly transforms into a full-blown feast as he devours all the beguni on the table. After just a few minutes, he is sweating and chewing, yet reaching for more mountains of rice and curry foods.

By the end of the main course, he declares, with one hand on his stomach, that he might not make it to Taraweeh. He demands water and, of course, mercy, only until dessert arrives.

The Muri Makha Experimenter

He does not merely "prepare" muri; he conducts a science experiment. First goes the muri, followed by chhola. But just when everyone starts to sigh in relief, he grabs the jilapi and crushes it into the muri makha. Without wasting any time, he squeezes half a lemon, adds a brown banana, along with some bundiya.

By this point, the muri is no longer crispy; it has become partially soggy, and the people watching are fully stressed.

The Iftar Economist

If you find yourself at an iftar table with a bowl of beef Haleem, while listening to commentary on how the price of beef has soared, you have encountered the “Iftar economist.” They talk incessantly about how lemons are now equivalent to gold, or how the beguni is giving him an itch, not from an allergy, but from its cost.

The Nonchalant Bhaat Lover

There is always this one person who has taken “maachhe bhaate bangali” to a whole new level, completely unfazed by all the muri makha and jilapi chaos. Even if you pile a dish of fried items or desserts, he would calmly wait for “bhaat.” The moment a dish of hot rice arrives, his iftar feels complete.

The “Three Fasts a Day” Kid

Pre-schoolers always want to fast like a responsible adult. But parents worry the five-year-old is too young to fast. So, the children are cheered to keep three fasts each day: sehri, lunch, and iftar included. Well, the real challenge is explaining to them why they cannot break their fast with a packet of potato chips and chocolate ice cream. Good luck with that!

The “I Trust Nobody with Alur Chop”

The alur chop is not just another iftar item; rather, a source of motivation during Ramadan. You might share a pot of Haleem, or offer someone an extra date, but you will protect your crispy and golden alur chop with your elbows, and if someone’s hand gets suspiciously close, you shoot them a glare. Because you believe in cliches like "sharing is caring," only when it is not about the alur chop.

The truth is, during iftar, we are all hungry, dramatic, and very unhinged. But no matter which type you are, between the chaos, crunching, and satisfying gulps of shorbot during iftar, we are all united in thanking our lucky stars for a table full of food every day without fail.