Relatively Confused
Artwork by Amina
I dress with care and dread
No matter how I look
I'll return with my ego in shreds.
Aunty A will be sure to say
"You look kind of fat today."
After a five-minute break
of as much as I can take
of holding in my tummy
I'll bump into aunty B
"Too much wandering in the sun?
You look so dark todayjaan.
No, maybe it's your saree colour,
Issh, you should have chosen another...
Enter wife of cousin number three
"Why, you've slimmed down beautifully!"
Just as I'm happily settling to eat
Cousin la model will come and screech:
"What's this, unplucked eyebrows,
and such long blouse sleeves!
Smarten up Apa pleease!"
Cousin Romeo will smirk,
"She doesn't care about fashion, only work,"
Cousin conscience-of-all will retort
"You people are sosmall.
She's simple in her tastes, that's all...
Dusky bhabi number two
will come to my rescue
and whisper sweetly
"Please don't mind your aunty B,
my meanshashuri.
You're not dark at all.
ujjal shamborno,that's what your colour
is rightly called...
After much more olfactory abuse
I'll return home confused
And make a pledge divine
The only other wedding I'll attend
Will be mine!
Rumana Siddique teaches English at Dhaka University.
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