Reflections
Catching rain
Remember I had said I would get back to you? Well, today I would like to start by saying for some days it is okay to let events choreograph their own course and fall in place where they may. My daughter and I are visiting my parents' village home. They are no longer living. And yet I come here to innocence, to the glow of golden evenings, to the fireflies of the night, to the frankness of good people, to sealed memories, to an anchor. I come back to love. And each time as I leave I reflect on my thirsting attraction for this home… With memories fleeting I lift my eyes / To the home that holds synthesis of lives / The old walls stand / quiet, true to history / Not laughter but notes of lives remain a mystery / By the pond I see the palm trees swing to blue / The lilt of the krishnachura creates beautiful hue / I could not rewind life nor fast forward the affinity / I stood a moment on the verge of now / And then took the step towards life's rhapsody / Home is what I left behind… During this visit I have been especially longing for rain, to savour the same quiet thrill that you had recently enjoyed on sultry wet days. I want to hear the even-tempered rhythm of raindrops on tin-shed roofs; walk barefoot in the rain, smell the fragrance of the good earth, feel the union of nature in me. Re-learn to know myself time after time! Today was a hot and humid summer afternoon. The sky was gradually becoming darker. With each clap of thunder growing louder, Doel, my three-and-a-half year old daughter, curled up in my arms. Her eyes were shut and the sensation of sound made her eyes quiver. She is growing up to be quite a brave and headstrong person! Realizing she is of an age that does not allow for a confession of fear, I simply mentioned that with rain the cool would come! 'Aahaan…' is all I could get out of her. Then I asked her: "Do you know why it thunders?" This made her attentive. Why, she inquired. The gift of reason she will acquire with age, but today I needed to give her a simple story that she could relish in her imagination-filled young mind. "You noticed how the clouds in the sky move?" "Yes," she replied. "They love to dance." "They dance!" Now I had her full attention. "While dancing they bump into each other making thunder and it causes beautiful rain." She smiled. Now it made sense to her. She said, "They are having too much fun! The clouds are making a lot of noise." Fun, she understands. I said, "And you know what happens when it rains? Water comes down from the sky and makes the grass greener, the trees become more beautiful, the ponds fill up, birds take showers, and you know what else? The flowers need water to become even more colourful!" Eagerly she interrupted me, "I know, I know! I love magenta color, like the roses in your garden, mommy. The grass and trees and flowers cannot drink, so they need water to fall from the sky." After a brief pause, with a sigh of relief she said, "I like that." I wanted her to feel the finesse of nature, and so I asked, "Do you want to catch the rain?" Her affirmation was the shine of curiosity in her eyes. She held my hand and off we went outside to sit on the rust colored stairs that slopes into the pond. Here and there the cement has come off because of aging. With the changing seasons this pond has gone through generations of bathing, swimming, gossip sharing; and during winter folks have paused for sun warmth before the dives. In the west corner, a few water lilies float to gather the algae. I gathered two lotus leaves, dried them with my anchal, kept one for myself and gave the other to my daughter. I showed her how to hold it between her two little hands to form a cup. Her eyes sparkled. We dipped our feet in the water. A gentle breeze started to blow, and we waited for the rain to come to earth. To us! And then it happened. One drop, two drops, and three and four! Doel looked at the first raindrop on her leaf. It slipped from one end to the center, and then another and another without leaving a trail, till it was so full that it spilled over. I could see her first inquisitive look and then a smile of pride gave way to a sense of satisfaction. She looked at me as if we had both witnessed a miracle. Life has its magical moments! Just as I would have, she closed her eyes and lifted her face to the sky to feel the rain. The rain drops bounced off her little nose, lips, eyes, forehead. Giggling, she said, "It tickles, mommy." And I whispered in my heart, feel the rain music, my child…feel the music! Then she opened her mouth to catch the rain. She was drenched and so was I. We sat there and allowed the rain to wrap us in its playful whim. And I prayed, Give me freedom, so I endure / To savor your tender curiosity / Let us dance with clouds tenderly / Share the marvel of thunder / See the glory of rain yonder / Let me embrace your innocence / You are spiritual communion of mine / So, when I go / Let it not end so / The bond with thine . . . With age she will encounter the changing world as it comes, but at that moment her divine face connected our separate beings. From now on, the scary thunder is never to be back in my child's life. There is enough time for her to find out how rain happens! I know…your and my experiences are different, that is meant to be…I am we, whereas you are the bohemian! Today I had the pleasure of adding one more gem of a memory to my warm sanctuary.
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