Trump to wear supporters’ masks first to immunise them at indoor rallies

Donald Trump yesterday signed an executive order that would “let his supporters get the benefit of his antibodies when he breathes into their masks” at rallies, heading into the elections on November 3.
23 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Minister plans to turn hospitals into special economic zones

Chapasthan was one of the first countries to declare all hospitals treating Covid-22 would be closed as they have managed to successfully eradicate the virus thanks to hard-immunity.
23 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Shimanta Jalil’s debut rap album is a misogynist’s dream

Shimanta Jalil, who made headlines last week for saying men would be tempted to rap about women if they wore “indecent” clothes, made another U-turn this week and released his latest album “The Burqa Boys: As A Brother”.
16 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Chapasthan to hand down capital punishment for cheating in exams, leaking exam question papers

In what will prove to be the final nail in the coffin for cheats, the extraordinarily gifted government of Chapasthan yesterday decreed the use of capital punishment for those involved in cheating during exams or leaking question papers.
16 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Satire: Shimanta Jalil meant to say ‘rap’ not ‘rape’; claims it was a pronunciation error

Village idiot turned self-made superstar Shimanta Jalil has become the first mainstream celebrity to call out the rape culture in Bangladesh, but he claims his message was misunderstood.
11 October 2020, 15:37 PM

The driver who became a legend

MD Rasel, a fresh graduate, was caught selling his newly bought BCS MP3 books in the capital’s Nilkhet Market. Backing his deed,
9 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Police hire student consultants to help them with tactics not covered in training

Our headlines say so much that we have to train our reporters in grammar and sentence reconstruction to help them fill the blank space. In the same way, police have recently hired politics loving students of Juggernaut University to help them fill up blank skills not covered by official training.
9 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Satireday Cartoon

Satireday Cartoon
9 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Politicians and bandwagon-jumping superstore, ‘celebrities’ declare verbal war only against rape

The country’s top leaders, a superstore that can turn everything into a PR opportunity and people who think they are celebrities all came out strongly against the growing incidents of rape.
9 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Govt opens mandatory ‘graffiti’ schools for all budding artists

The government has opened art schools in every district of the country with a special focus on graffiti.
2 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Football King delivers victory speech in another unopposed election

Football King Aloo-deen is sitting quietly on his chair at a function celebrating his latest victory in the top-most position of a local almost religious association.
2 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Women relocation drive: Rape incidents to fall to only 6 per day

The country gears up for celebration as incidents of rape are set to fall to only six per day following a women relocation drive by the Dhoka city authorities.
2 October 2020, 18:00 PM

Aging world leaders still confused about green energy, people’s rights and other Gen-Z things

Aging world leaders met once again at the Conference of the Wizened held in one of the oldest country’s in the world. Do you see a theme here already?
25 September 2020, 18:00 PM

Bangladesh Opposition Party to start protesting in places besides their own office

The Bangladesh Opposition Party (BOP), the former official opposition party, has decided to launch yet another month-long movement to remove the current ruling party from office.
25 September 2020, 18:00 PM

Man with 4 cars, 8 flats worried about overpopulation

“I know the thought on everyone’s minds. I am just gonna say it out loud: there are way too many people with way too little to go around. Something needs to be done!” said Zarif Khan, the founder of Kalot Aaka, a boutique art shop in Berrydhara.
25 September 2020, 18:00 PM

Probe body finds women sitting improperly on bikes behind rising road accidents

After admitting his failure in bringing discipline to the roads, last year Road Transport Minister of Chapasthan Omaigo Bader said a task force would be formed to handle the matter.
18 September 2020, 18:00 PM

Satire retired in the country, no joke

Any and every form of satire in Chapasthan has been stopped, and not because of a government edict or court ruling, but because blossoming satire publications had to devote majority page space to explain the word satire alone.
18 September 2020, 18:00 PM

'We aren’t going abroad to learn how to cook kichuri, you idiots'

“We aren’t going to America to just learn how to make Kichuri. We are going there to understand food management and gather experiences in making kichuri without onions and spices,” Food Minister Mohanuzzaman said.
18 September 2020, 18:00 PM

Five reasons why Nishat Tasnim is grateful for masks

Twenty-five-year-old Nishat Tasnim, the 6,079th of her name, has recently returned to work under the pretension that the coronavirus pandemic was a collective hallucination. She is grateful that everyone is now wearing masks, and not just because it keeps the virus away.
11 September 2020, 18:00 PM

No one is cheating during online exams, teachers still believe

A school in the capital set a record for the highest number of toppers during an assessment conducted by the educational institution.
11 September 2020, 18:00 PM