When women suffer, the world suffers too

It's always a challenge to come up with a piece for International Women's Day that will not sound clichéd and filled with lofty recommendations that are bound to make policy makers and anti feminists (if they have even deigned to read this at all) yawn with boredom. But on this day apparently I am elevated to a status that gives me the 'privilege' of being as tiresomely 'feminist' as I want.

So let me start with that 'dreaded' word: empowerment. What does it really mean, for a woman in particular? To have her treated as an equal human being? So that she is not paid half the wages of a man or deprived of an education, healthcare, the right to make decisions regarding her body, the right to choose when and who she will marry, the right to earn her own living and be the mistress of her own home? Will it entail the custody of her child if her marriage crumbles or the ability to leave her abusive husband and have a safe place to stay? Will it be her ability to take part in politics where she will be respected and accepted as an equal? Does it simply mean being able to move around in public without being sexually harassed, physically assaulted or brutally murdered?

As basic as these rights are on paper, the truth is that our tenacious grip of patriarchal customs have ensured that they are not rights but 'privileges' of the few. Patriarchy has shaped our value system, religious practices, even our laws have made women's path to emancipation rocky, painful, and tortuous. Why so cynical you may ask. Have we not made remarkable progress in terms of women's development? Yes of course we have, in innumerable ways. We have more women in the workforce than ever before – the labour force participation for women is 36 percent (Bangladesh Labour force Survey 2010), it could be even more by now. We have had women heads of state since 1991 and the third highest number of women lawmakers among the SAARC countries. There are women in our police force, armed forces and peace keeping missions abroad with exemplary performance records. There are more girls in school than ever before and often doing better than boys. We have a higher number of women entrepreneurs and more women in science than we thought.

All this is making a huge difference to our economy and social development and there is great effort behind this progress from the government, private and non government sectors.

But no matter how far we seem to be going forward, there are stronger forces pulling us backwards. If you are an avid follower of news you will not be surprised to know that last year 126 women were killed because of torture by their husbands and in-laws because of dowry with four more committing suicide; 724 girls and women were raped with 37 deaths of women after rape and 16 women committed suicide after being raped (Ain O Shalish Kendra). The stories of inhuman torture on women and girls make news every day.

These are embarrassing statistics for our lawmakers and the worst part is that they represent only the numbers reported in the media. It's uncomfortable for them because there are specific laws, that if enforced with proper legal procedure, could at least put those who are responsible for these despicable crimes, behind bars. We have an anti dowry law, an anti stalking law, a law to give the severest punishment for rape and murder after rape of women and girls. We also have a Child Marriage Restraint Act 2017 though the recent 'special provision' has the potential to actually increase the number of child marriages rather than reduce them.

The problem goes back to our submission to our patriarchal traditions that force young girls to drop out of school, abandon their dreams and be married. A recent household survey by Oxfam finds 49 percent women being married off without their consent. Early marriage will mean early motherhood, taking a high toll on the girl's health and that of her baby who may be born underweight and stunted. Many of these girls, burdened with the demands of sudden adulthood (which includes marital rape and other forms of abuse) and household responsibilities will miss out on getting a job and earning their own income. They will be economically dependent on their husbands and therefore under their control, which of course is the ultimate goal of a patriarchal society.

The tragedy of such gross injustice goes beyond personal suffering of the girls and women in question. It is a tragedy that we as a nation must suffer the consequences of, which are far reaching and devastating. A society where a huge number of its female members are subject to regular violence, unable to reach their full physical and intellectual potential, in which generations are born stunted or malnourished is an ill, crippled, dying society. A nation that is deprived of the skills, knowledge and wellbeing of millions of women because they are deliberately confined within the walls of chauvinism is a nation that will constantly fall behind in the race to development. A country's strength and image is determined by the way it treats its girls and women. We talk a lot about our seven plus growth rate and our journey to becoming a middle income country. But such dreams will never be realised in real terms until we are able to give women the status that they deserve through equal treatment in all spheres of life. Are we ready to do not only what is right but what is crucial for our own survival?